Most women spend the first few decades of their lives struggling to discover who they are and how to be happy, but once they reach their middle age, some begin to see the truth. They haven't really been working to be 'good enough' all this time; they've been working to get others to treat them the way they deserve! With that wisdom, they learn to let go of a lot of self-judgement. It opens the doors to so much self-love that I, a 41-year-old, have found an incredible well of happiness in the last couple of years. Of course, having my children has also helped with this - they are a font of joy! So, too, has finding out that I'm autistic; it explains a lot that I don't have to feel inferior about anymore. I am also discovering that letting go of traditional femininity is a blessing. My forties have become a catharsis in uncountable ways.
     I have many intersections: bi, non-binary, formerly homeless, former foster kid, survivor of abuse and rape, fat, poor, elder, unattractive, physically disabled, mentally ill, autistic, no college degree, female. I also have a few privileges: I have light skin and blue eyes, I have an okay singing voice, I have pretty stable housing, food, and healthcare, I'm a citizen, I have almost all of my physical abilities, and I am married to a man with light-colored skin who can sometimes advocate for me (that is a privilege, believe me - let me know if you need to borrow him). I can't list all of my privileges at the moment, because like all humans, I have a much easier time remembering what to complain about than what to be grateful for! The reason I mention all of these things is so that the reader knows a little about where I'm coming from, and how hard I'm trying to be intersectionally antiracist and feminist. I spend hours every day thinking about right, wrong, privilege, how to make the world a better place, and how I can be a better person. If you think I've missed something, or you don't like something I say here, or you have thought of a way that I can help you or somebody you know, please contact me and we'll talk about it. Becoming a better person is a process, and I will never be perfect, so I will always be open to learning.
     When I was a child, life was hard for me; my parents pretended their abuse was actually justified punishment because of imaginary crimes they said I committed. I mentally escaped into a lot of literary fiction that made me hope for a world where heroism and justice were possible. I suppose it's the combination of needing to prove that I'm not a bad person and wishing desperately for justice that has turned me into a social justice warrior and a volunteer, now that I'm older. While I feel altruistic in my soul, I know that trying to be a good person, for me, probably has roots in my painful childhood. The truth is, the desire to help others doesn't spring in pure form from any person. If your parents told you that they expected you to grow up and be a doctor, you're likely doing your best to meet that goal. You probably believe that you're becoming a doctor to help people, and that is partially true, but deep inside, you're largely doing it to make your parents happy. I'm aware that my obsession comes partly from the damage my parents did, and partly from the tendency that most autistic people have to become preoccupied with justice. Maya Angelou said something like: that you should believe people the first time they tell you who they are - here it is, me telling you!
     I started Sublime Serendipity simply because I love making things for people. It is a delight to ask questions and get every detail right and deliver a product that makes people feel understood, appreciated, and cared for. Making money will always be less important to me than making the world a better place. Currently, I make very few sales per year, and many of the products I make are either for my children or are free custom items for people who are having a hard time in life and can use a little cheering up.
     One of my other passions is housing. I am currently serving on the Washington State Department of Commerce Permanent Supportive Housing Advisory Committee to help ensure that people with disabilities or other needs are adequately cared-for in their living situations. I am sitting on the Board of Northwest Hospitality, an organization that helps unhoused people, to lend voice to people like me, and to design and host a conference to educate those in the housing sector about ways that current government, development, landlord, nonprofit, and other housing insecurity industrial complex systems are failing and perpetuating homelessness in this country. I have also made a petition to end homelessness in America.
     One of the things I'm most proud of is having been instrumental in creating Delridge Grocery Cooperative in the West Seattle neighborhood of Seattle. When Barack Obama was soon to be elected, I was so inspired that I took his message of volunteerism to heart. I started volunteering in my neighborhood, and the thing that I heard people say they wanted most for the Delridge neighborhood in West Seattle, over and over, was a grocery store. There was no source of healthy food, and it was a long bus ride to a grocery store. So I made flyers and a local volunteer showed up and said that we should make it a cooperative! Together, she and I worked for years, and she kept going after I left the neighborhood, and today the co-op is growing every day. The project 100% succeeded because of her, but I definitely gave a huge part of my heart to it!
     When I was a homeless 17-year-old, I hitchhiked across the country to go to a sort of festival in a forest called the Rainbow Gathering, and then I went to a political rally and concert on the original Yasgur's Farm at the site of the original Woodstock music festival to commemorate the 30-year anniversary (and almost ended up singing the national anthem to open, but I choked). Not many years after that, I went on a short mission to Nicaragua to provide optical and medical and dental care to people living in poverty. My job was to take down their names and medical information, using my very limited Spanish. I'm proud of that!
     The things I love include: karaoke, science fiction and fantasy in literature and film, Dungeons and Dragons (I call myself a Dungeon Keeper, not a Dungeon Master), video/computer games, camping, hiking, board games, swimming, CRAFTING all kinds of things (always interested to learn new ways to make things!), I used to enjoy dancing when my back allowed it, I want to go skydiving someday, I want to live on Mars one day, I love volunteering to help causes like Black Lives Matter, the DREAM Act, LGBTQ+, the environment, and antihouselessness, and I like cooking, and I collect proper ROYGBP rainbows :-)